TripAdvisor: We Are Not Making This Up.

"The damn customers! Always eating in front of me and NOT SHARING!"

From a cover letter:

"I am considered to be a person of rapid learning, active, demanding, enterprising, confident, intelligent, and after my experience with customers, I am, above all, hungry."

What not to do if you want to work here (part 5)

Tip #5: This belongs on your medical chart, not your resume:

- MARITAL STATUS: SINGLE   BLOOD GROUP: O+   HEIGHT 5’8” 

What not to do if you want to work here (part 4)

Tip #4: Don't send this cover letter:

Gentlemen:
I would like to come in for an interview.
My day off is Wednesday.
B----

It will make us want to respond like this:

B----:
Wednesday is not good for us. Ever.
Everyone at TripAdvisor (some of whom, shockingly, are female)

What not to do if you want to work here (part 3)

Tip #3: It's fine to interview in different fields at the same time. However, this does not mean you should use one cover letter for every job you apply for... particularly if you are looking at very dissimilar fields.

"I'm interested in publishing and nutrition." [The Owl is interested in professional hockey and mice. Nice to meet you.]

What not to do if you want to work here (part 2)

Tip #2: Please don't give yourself a cheesy nickname.

Name: Joe 'Mr. Determined' Schmo

What not to do if you want to work here (part 1)

We're going to post some snippets of actual cover letters and résumés we've received. You might consider forwarding this to any college students you know who are about to hit the job market!

Tip #1: Don't attempt to impress us with your grade-school achievements. Especially if they're not all that impressive in the first place.

And rest assured I know my grammar and geography; I came in second place in my class spelling bee and fifth in the geography bee.

Looks like Joe Wilson and Valerie Plame want new careers

To: TripAdvisor Support
Subject: VP of Marketing and CEO

Hi,

My name is -----. My wife, ----- and I really enjoy the trip advisor website.

We truly believe Trip Advisor needs a family face to its brand name and we have just the ticket.

We are highly passionate about becoming the Mystery Travelers and Marketing Guru's of the Travel Industry. I.E. Martha Stewart of cooking, Jim Kramer of Stocks, Rachel Ray of Food TV etc. We feel there is a need for an all American couple that is loving and passionate about the Travel Industry that can give tips by going to destinations and giving formal reviews and reports on where to stay for vacations, business trips and the such. (Americans want to relate) Our plan came up while traveling and since then we have been narrowing it down to a company that has this same vision for consumers.

No doubt passion is what one really needs to be great of something and this is our calling. We have high interest already and would love to set down and talk to CEO and VP of Sales and Marketing.

I have a background in E-commerce, Sales and Marketing with some Extensive International Travel like Africa Safari's to Greece. My wife ----- has some extensive international travel as well with a background as an Attorney, FBI Agent in terrorism, School Teacher, and Fraud Investigator.

We look forward to hearing from you.

Sincerely,
----- & ------